"Human beings fear the unknown. So, whatever''s freaking you
out, grab it by the balls and say hello. Then it ain''t the unknown
anymore and it ain''t scary. Or I guess it could be a shitload
scarier."
Fans of the #1 bestseller Sh*t My Dad Says will
recognize the always-patient voice of Justin Halpern''s dad as it
crackles through the pages of this hysterical new book. The story
begins when Justin takes his dad out to lunch to announce that
he''s decided to propose to his girlfriend.
"You''ve been dating her for four years," his dad replies. "It
ain''t like you found a parallel fucking universe."
But eventually he gives Justin some advice: that he should take
a day off and think back over everything he''s learned in life
about women, relationships, and himself before making his decision.
And that''s just what Justin does-revisiting everything from his
disastrous childhood crushes to the night he finally lost his
virginity while working as a dishwasher at Hooters.
I Suck at Girls is full of his dad''s patented brand of
wisdom. But it''s also full of new characters just as funny as his
dad-from his brother, who provides insights into wedding night
rituals ("You stand in one corner of the room, and she stands in
the other. You each take off one piece of clothing at a time") to
his first boss, who warns Justin to man up: "That''s what a man
does. He takes his shots and then he scrubs the shit out of some
dishes." The result is a pilgrim''s progress through the landscape
of sex and love-by one of the funniest writers at work today.
From the author of the massive #1 "New York Times"-bestseller "Sh*t My Dad Says" comes a laugh-out-loud funny and touching story about relationships with the opposite sex, from his first kiss to getting engaged and all the awkward moments in between.
