Questions and Topics for Discussion
1) All four of the women who star in Little Earthquakes
have complicated relationships with their mothers or mothers-in
law. Think about how these relationships affect them and the bonds
they develop with their babies. For instance, how do Ayinde''s
childhood memories and the current dynamics between her and her
mother affect the relationship she develops with Julian? Ayinde
clearly wants to raise her child differently than her parents
raised her, but she also shows she wants to live up to her
mother''s expectations by taking Baby Success! seriously.
How do you think this blend of motivations will affect Julian?
2) In Little Earthquakes, Ayinde, Kelly, and Becky each
take a different approach to raising their baby. Ayinde tries
Baby Success!; Kelly starts with a type A approach,
keeping track of every little detail on spreadsheets and making
sure Oliver has the perfect clothes and toys; and Becky goes for a
more laid back, all-natural strategy. How do their approaches work
out for them? Does any one approach seem to work out better than
the others?
3) In the midst of their personal troubles, Becky''s friends
sometimes have a hard time remembering the ways in which they are
fortunate. Kelly, in particular, tends to be scornful when people
call her "lucky." But towards the end of the novel, Becky says, "If
there was one lesson she''d learned from new motherhood, and from
her friends, it was that any bit of good fortune had to be counted
as lucky?and that there was always, always someone worse off than
you" (398). How does motherhood help put things in perspective for
Becky? What does she learn from her friends, and what can we learn
by comparing the experiences of each of the four women?
4) Kelly puts a lot of pressure on herself and on Steven to
maintain the kind of life she couldn''t have growing up. The
schedule she tries to maintain is difficult, but it''s not that
different from the "double shift" of work and chores that many
women take on when they have kids. Still, as the article in
Power magazine read, "if Kelly O''Hara Day, with her
smarts and her savvy and her Ivy League degree, can''t successfully
integrate a career and a family, it doesn''t suggest that things
for other working mothers are much different -- or that thirty some
years after the feminists waged a so-called revolution, the
workplace is likely to become a kinder, gentler place for the women
who will follow in her footsteps" (441). Do you think Kelly
mismanaged her life, or do you think the choices available to
working women, are, as the reporter wrote, likely to put any woman
in a tough spot? Can women today really have it all, or do they
need to choose between having a family and having a career?
5) Both Ayinde and Kelly consider divorce at some point. When
Ayinde considers leaving Richard, she thinks of the chapter on
divorce in Baby Success!: "Marriage on the rocks? Keep
your eyes on the prize. Remember what really matters. Remember who
comes first?.Babies do better with mommy and daddy both under the
same roof" (298-9). Is this good advice? Were you surprised that
Ayinde patched things up with Richard? Do you think either Ayinde
or Kelly should have followed through with a divorce?
6) When Lia flees to Philadelphia, she leaves her husband
behind, even though they love each other very much. She says,
"Every time he looked at me, he''d see what we had lost; every time
I looked at him, I''d see the same thing. I couldn''t stay. I
couldn''t stay and hurt him anymore" (5). Why does Lia assume that
her presence is hurting her husband? Where does her sense of
culpability and guilt come from, and how do they complicate her
grief? Why does she finally reach out to Sam?
7) After Ayinde learns what''s causing Julian''s heart murmur,
she thinks, "A hole in his heart. It was almost poetic. She''d been
walking around for weeks feeling like someone had torn a hole in
her own" (354). How does Julian''s malady reflect the injury that
Ayinde has sustained on an emotional level, and what do his
prospects for health and well-being imply about hers and the
well-being of her friends, who have each had their own
struggles?
8) Kelly''s mother, Paula, tries to convince her daughter that
covetousness is a sin. She says, "You should be concerned with the
state of your soul, not the state of your bank account" (48).
Considering the kind of life Kelly had at home, it''s not
surprising that she doesn''t take her mother''s advice to heart.
Should she have taken her more seriously? Why does Kelly strive so
hard to find the perfect accessories? Is she truly covetous? Is she
looking for security? Does she wish to appear affluent? Does she
appreciate nice things aesthetically? Whatever her motivation is,
do you think she will ever be satisfied by the acquisition of
objects?
9) Like all of the other characters, Ayinde''s life changes
dramatically when she has Julian. However, unlike Becky and Kelly,
she also finds that she can no longer continue her career, due to
her new husband''s celebrity. How does Ayinde''s sense of self
change after she marries and has her baby? Do you think she makes
choices for Julian and for herself that she would not have made if
she could work? How is her relationship with her husband and baby
affected by her decision not to pursue her career?
10) Becky has struggled with body image throughout her life, but
her pregnancy seems to draw her attention to her weight more than
usual. She had hoped that pregnancy would allow her to relax a
little, but instead she finds herself playing "pregnant or just
fat?" How does this disappointment and Becky''s struggle with body
image affect her experience with pregnancy?
11) Similarly, the characters experience numerous aspects of
pregnancy and childbirth that they didn''t really expect, or with
which they were disappointed. Together, they discuss things that
surprised them like the unpleasant physical side affects of
pregnancy and baby farts, and more serious unexpected problems like
Lia''s trouble getting Caleb to sleep. Why do you think the
characters, many of whom read books like What to Expect When
You''re Expecting or took classes in childbirth and baby care,
found themselves confused and surprised so often? How did their
expectations of motherhood conflict with reality? Where do you
think their expectations came from?