I had heard good things about this book. As an oncology nurse, I am
a realist. As the wife of a cancer survivor, I'm an optimist. But I
also know the reality of how this disease can affect every part of
a person's life.
I was afraid this book was going to be morose and melancholy. But
it was surprisingly upbeat and funny.
Randy Pausch gives a lecture, which is basically his memoirs. He
knows he has terminal Pancreatic cancer and takes this opportunity
to say good bye. He says it was about Achieving Your Childhood
Dreams, but it was really about him reliving his life in a form
that could be passed on to his young children, who would have very
few memories of him. I can relate to that as well, since my father
died when I was three. I would love to have had something that he
had written, or more pictures, or even videotape so I could hear
his voice and see how he carried himself.
Cancer is a horrible illness, but it has one thing over sudden
death. It usually gives you time to say what you need to say.
That's the only good thing about cancer. Some people don't take the
opportunity, but it's there nonetheless.
I've seen people die who are still in denial about the severity of
their illness. For all their denial, they still die, but with
unfinished business. I've also seen "good" deaths. Those where
they've said their goodbyes, given their advice, gotten their
affairs in order, left a legacy, and asked their family members to
let them go. A good death is as much a blessing as a good life.
This book has made me laugh and cry, and look again at the big
picture. I've liked working with oncology patients because I've
always found them to be "real". They've dealt with, or are working
through the big issues of life, and what's bigger than facing your
mortality and considering eternity?
In all my years of nursing, I've only cried at three deaths, all of
them young men. I only now make the connection with my father, who
died when he was 28. But I digress.
This book is not so much about dying, although he does talk about
it, as it is about living, and appreciating the time you're given.
To use a cliché, "Every day is a gift. That's why it's called the
Present."