Baby Proof: A Novel by Emily GiffinBaby Proof: A Novel by Emily Giffin

Baby Proof: A Novel

byEmily Giffin

Paperback | May 15, 2007

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Baby Proof

Emily Griffin

A novel that explores the question: Is there ever a deal-breaker when it comes to true love?

Claudia Parr has everything going for her. A successful editor at a publishing house in Manhattan, she's also a devoted sister, aunt, and friend. Yet she's never wanted to become a mother--which she discovers is a major hurdle to marriage, something she desperately wants. Then she meets her soul mate Ben who, miraculously, feels the same way about parenthood. The two fall in love and marry, committed to one another and their life of adventure and discovery. All's well until one of them has a change of heart. Someone wants a baby after all.

This is the witty, heartfelt story about what happens to the perfect couple when they suddenly want different things and there is no compromise. It's about deciding what is most important in life and wagering everything to get it. And most of all, it's about the things we will--and won't--do for love.

Emily Giffin is the author of several New York Times bestselling novels, including Something Borrowed, which has been adapted as a major motion picture. A graduate of Wake Forest University and the University of Virginia School of Law, she lives in Atlanta with her family.
Title:Baby Proof: A NovelFormat:PaperbackDimensions:368 pages, 8.26 × 5.51 × 0.94 inPublished:May 15, 2007Publisher:St. Martin's PressLanguage:English

The following ISBNs are associated with this title:

ISBN - 10:0312348657

ISBN - 13:9780312348656

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Rated 5 out of 5 by from Beautiful Read A lovely story about the power of love and soul mates. Great to read if you are currently stuck at an impass..
Date published: 2018-11-05
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Good story Good story about a married couple - one who doesn't want kids, and one who changes their mind about not wanting kids.
Date published: 2018-08-06
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Liked it before I started reading this book I was under the assumption that it would continue the story of Darcy & Ethan, Rachel and Dex... But this book has completely new characters. That was a little disappointing but it was still a great book. I love her style of writing. #plumreviews
Date published: 2018-06-08
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Liked it Not the most exciting book, but that's fine. I liked the story, and was interested in how it would turn out for not only the main characters, but every character in the book.
Date published: 2018-04-20
Rated 3 out of 5 by from I enjoyed this book and am happy with the way the book ended Claudia and Ben are the perfect couple. who are both enjoying their married child free life. Although they both agreed neither wants to have children, Ben is not so sure after their mutual friends are going to have a baby. Claudia forces Ben to make a choice either be happy and child free with her or be with someone else. Once they realize that neither one is willing to compromise, they get a divorce. During this time, Claudia does a lot a soul searching to figure out why she doesn't want kids. She likes kids, but she doesn't view herself as the motherly type. Also during Claudia and Ben's time apart, she begins to question whether or not he really was her soulmate. After all, if he was her soulmate, wouldn't her want the same things she wants in life? Should she be willing to compromise what she wants for the man she loves? Are children the ultimate deal breaker in marriage? The novel is very realistic, and there were moments when I laughed to myself. This really captures the emotions and desperation of that awkward stage that serious happens the first time.
Date published: 2018-01-31
Rated 5 out of 5 by from Lovely Such a pager turner a great book to start with if you haven't read any of her material.
Date published: 2018-01-20
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Good Book #PlumReward This book is fun and witty, it follows the life of a young woman who from a young age was sure she would never want children. She loved to be an aunt, but having children was never part of what she wanted. She meets a wonderful man who shares her thoughts about this matter... Until he doesn't. Her husband now does want children and it breaks up their marriage, they both go out with different people until they realize that they want to be together. Even if they have to sacrifice the things they want most in life. The side characters also have their own stories and struggles, as well as accomplishments. This book is very realistic and draws readers into its narrative easily.
Date published: 2018-01-12
Rated 4 out of 5 by from A Great Read Great read! I love this author and the way she writes! This book was a delight and a quick read
Date published: 2018-01-04
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Fun read even if not her best Emily Giffin's books are great - this one was not as good as her others. However, it was a fun read & I still enjoyed the story, the plot, the characters & the twist. Emily Giffin is a great author & I would recommend it - just drop the expectations & enjoy.
Date published: 2017-12-21
Rated 2 out of 5 by from Decent Read, not great I enjoy most Emily Giffin novels, this one was mediocre. Kind of like a dog chasing its tail, eventually it gets there but you keep going in circles until you do.
Date published: 2017-11-11
Rated 2 out of 5 by from Disappointed I picked this up after reading Something Borrowed & Something Blue and I wasn't impressed
Date published: 2017-11-08
Rated 5 out of 5 by from Love conquers all I cannot imagine a woman who would not want to have kids so this was the main pull why I even bought the book. When I read through the book it helped me see a new perspective. I just love how towards the end, the main character realized she would be willing to give up her stand about not having kids just so she can be with the one she truly loves. Love conquers all
Date published: 2017-07-17
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Excellent I would certainly recommend. Not my favourite EG but definitely worth the read
Date published: 2017-07-10
Rated 5 out of 5 by from Classic EG! A good addition to her series.
Date published: 2017-06-14
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Great read These were a great fun series to read
Date published: 2017-03-27
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Great! A thoughtful look at what happens when someone changes their mind.
Date published: 2017-02-09
Rated 5 out of 5 by from LOVED Well written novel! You can't put this one down until its finished! #plumreview
Date published: 2017-02-09
Rated 3 out of 5 by from What a dilemna I was intrigued by the summary and found it an easy thought provoking read.
Date published: 2017-01-31
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Good Good book with an interesting question
Date published: 2017-01-24
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Great book Great book about a woman who doesn't want child.
Date published: 2017-01-23
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Easy read but keeps you interested Love the style of writing of Emily Giffins writing, not unlike her other books this one is set up similar. Kept me interested in what would happen and had me convinced of an alternate ending a few times. Just wish it hadn't wrapped up do quick at the end with such little detail. Still good for a quick read though.
Date published: 2016-12-11
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Girls night! Perfect book for a quick read! #plumreview
Date published: 2016-12-04
Rated 5 out of 5 by from Baby Proof Could not put down this book. One of her top books for sure!!!!!
Date published: 2016-11-28
Rated 5 out of 5 by from Loved this! Great novel! A modern dilemma in a world that still shames women who don't want to have children. It was very refreshing to read. #plumreview
Date published: 2016-11-19
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Baby Proof Not as good as her first 2, but still a decent, quick read.
Date published: 2016-11-14
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Good Very easy read, with likeable characters. I like how there was an overlap in characters from previous books. Highly recommend Emily Giffin.
Date published: 2016-11-09
Rated 3 out of 5 by from Easy read Similar to her other novels, another easy but enjoyable read. #plumreview
Date published: 2016-11-05
Rated 3 out of 5 by from Okay if you're looking for a quick and easy read, this book is for you. The plot is very basic but it's not her worst novel. #plumreview
Date published: 2016-11-04
Rated 3 out of 5 by from Okay if you're looking for a quick and easy read, this book is for you. The plot is very basic but it's not her worst novel. #plumreview
Date published: 2016-11-04
Rated 3 out of 5 by from Simple but good This book had a very simplistic plot. It was an easy enjoyable read but trying to describe the plot to someone makes it seem very dull and simple.
Date published: 2016-11-04
Rated 3 out of 5 by from A good read An enjoyable book.
Date published: 2013-06-15
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Decent book Similar story line to all her books but a easy enjoyable read
Date published: 2012-12-27
Rated 5 out of 5 by from completely relateable story and characters This is by far my favorite book - Emily Giffin has a way of writing stories about real people that you are able to relate to in some way. I couldn't put this book down! I have read all of her books and this is the absolutely my favorite.
Date published: 2012-05-11
Rated 3 out of 5 by from Pretty good Not bad of a book, I enjoy this author but her earlier stuff is better
Date published: 2011-06-21
Rated 5 out of 5 by from Loved it! I thought this book was a great read. I couldn't help but feel sorry for the main character. I have thoroughly enjoyed Emily Giffin's books. Can't wait for Emily to publish more books!
Date published: 2010-10-13
Rated 5 out of 5 by from One of my favorite Giffin novels Just finished reading this for the second time. I really enjoyed this novel. To see the side of a woman who doesn't want children and the fight to defend her position. Not as easy as you would think.
Date published: 2010-09-24
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Oh, Baby I wasn't automatically interested in this book when I started, but my opinion quickly changed. It was a pretty good book. Although I found it to be predictable at times (especially at the end), I did have fun reading it. Wasn't asgood as Emily Giffin's previous two, but it is still worth the read.
Date published: 2010-09-14
Rated 2 out of 5 by from Dissapointed... Absolutely loved Emily Giffin's books, but this one did not live up to my expectations. Baby Proof is about a couple considering a baby and how one partner's wants are different from another one's wants.Too much descriptive reading, not enough dialogue.
Date published: 2010-04-06
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Another Great Giffin Novel Before you get married it's really easy to say that the two of you want the same things. The thing is sometimes one half of the couple changes their mind and then things start to fall apart because both want different things now. And then we come to some really really hasty decisions that we come to regret. That pretty much sums of another great novel that answers the questions "How can you love someone if both of you want totally opposite things?". This book goes beyond the whole idea of compromise and takes into account one woman's journey to discovering that just because she and her husband have a totally different view on the idea of children, it doesn't mean that they love each other any less. The novel goes to show that some things cannot be compromised, but can be worked out in the end with sacrifice for the one you love most.
Date published: 2010-01-01
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Great Summer Read This book is just as good as Giffin's first two, Something Borrowed and Something Blue. You don't have to read the first two for this book to be clear. There is barely any character overlap. There is only one instance (with Ethan) and if you have not read the first two books by Giffin then you won't even notice. The overlap is merely a relationship update on past characters from something Blue. A great summer read. The book is a fast, cute, and lively read. Perfect for on the beach, passing time at home/work, or long transportation rides. You'll be done in no time! However, I did enjoy Something Borrowed and Something Blue more than I did Baby Proof.
Date published: 2009-07-20
Rated 3 out of 5 by from Disappointed After reading Giffin's other 3 novels I was slightly disappointed by Baby Proof. It was not up to the same caliber of "Quality Chick Lit" that I have come to expect from Emily Giffin. The story line is interesting and had tonnes of potential. A couple marries, agreeing that neither want children, and then one of them changes their mind. Giffin brings us into the emotional rollercoaster of martial problems and divorce. While I enjoyed some of the other characters in the novel, I did not like the main character Claudia at all. I found her unreasonable and completely self-absorbed. I believe this is the main reason I didn't enjoy the novel as much as I thought I would. I could never feel sorry for her or really relate to her at all. I just kept thinking, "What? Who would do that? She's so ridiculous" (okay that was the PG version of what I was actually thinking). I was, however, glad I read the book and loved the little visit Claudia (a book publisher) gets from Ethan who gives a short up date on Darcy (two characters from her first two novels).
Date published: 2009-01-30
Rated 5 out of 5 by from LOVED IT! I really enjoyed this book - feel good book - well written!!!
Date published: 2008-11-21
Rated 5 out of 5 by from A great read! Although I loved this book, I was a bit disappointed. It wasn't nearly as good as SOMETHING BORROWED or SOMETHING BLUE. Still definitely a great book!
Date published: 2008-09-11
Rated 5 out of 5 by from Bravo!!! Way to go Emily Giffin.... I love her books .I 've read the first two and now with this one I just felt it was a pleasure. Every spare moment I'd pick up this book .It is not a continuation of the first two books .It was about a young couple who made a deal about not to have children and the deal was broken .Will they be able to over come or just move on ?The ending wasn't too bad .I'd certainly reccommend this book .
Date published: 2008-08-17
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Good Chick Lit While I would recommend Something Borrowed & Something Blue before this book, I did enjoy reading it. Having just finished a pretty intense, large novel, I was looking for some light-hearted Chick Lit and this fit the bill completely. If this was the first Emily Giffin book that you read, PLEASE pick up either of the two mentionned above. She is an enjoyable author and I do look forward to "Love The One You're With."
Date published: 2008-03-18
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Likeable I really love Emily Giffin's books, easy to read and hard to put down. Her first 2 books were so fabulous, I guess I was wanting more of those characters. Baby Proof was a good book and you are compelled to see how it will all end. It's definitely worth the read, and I'm really looking forward to her next book this year!!!
Date published: 2008-01-07
Rated 5 out of 5 by from Fantastic Book When I heard Emily Giffin had another book coming out I had to get this one. I loved her first two Something Borrowed and Something Blue and I was not disapppointed by her latest in the least. Her books are so well written that you feel like you are there with the main character, I didn't want the book to end. I can't wait for her next book. I recommend reading this book.
Date published: 2008-01-04
Rated 5 out of 5 by from Loved it I have loved all of Emily Giffin's books. They are easy to read and very entertaining. I can hardly wait for the next book.
Date published: 2007-07-01
Rated 5 out of 5 by from Great book I was disappointed at first to find out that her new book was not a continuation of her first two. However, the latter is as interesting as the former books. The author is someone who can write a novel about an unoriginal idea whilst making it fresh and creative. Not only is this book an easy read, it is smart, witty, and funny. I recommend fans and new readers to read this book.
Date published: 2007-06-07
Rated 4 out of 5 by from Really good book I loved Emily Giffin's first two books, Something Borrowed and Something Blue, so when her next book camce out I was at the bookstores first thing in the morning trying to get it. Once again Emily Giffin compells you in this awesome story. Definitely a good read!
Date published: 2007-05-07

Read from the Book

BABY PROOF (Chapter One)I never wanted to be a mother. Even when I was a little girl, playing dolls with my two sisters, I assumed the role of the good Aunt Claudia. I would bathe and diaper and cradle their plastic babies and then be on my way, on to more exciting pursuits in the backyard or basement. Grown-ups called my position on motherhood "cute"--flashing me that same knowing smile they give little boys who insist that all girls have cooties. To them, I was just a spunky tomboy who would someday fall in love and fall in line.Those grown-ups turned out to be partially right. I did outgrow my tomboy stage and I did fall in love--several times, in fact--beginning with my high school boyfriend, Charlie. But when Charlie gazed into my eyes after our senior prom and asked me how many children I wanted, I reported a firm "zero.""None?" Charlie looked startled, as if I had just confessed to him a terrible, dark secret. "Why not?"I had a lot of reasons, which I laid out that night, but none that satisfied him. Charlie wasn't alone. Of the many boyfriends who followed him, none seemed to understand or accept my feelings. And although my relationships ended for a variety of reasons, I always had the sense that babies were a factor. Still, I truly believed that I would someday find my guy, that one person who would love me as is, without condition, without the promise of children. I was willing to wait for him.But around the time I turned thirty, I came to terms with the fact that I might wind up alone. That I might never have that gut feeling when you know you've found the One. Instead of feeling sorry for myself or settling for something less than extraordinary, I focused my energy on things I could more easily control--my career as an editor at a big publishing company, fascinating trips, great times with good friends and interesting writers, evenings of fine wine and sparkling conversation. Overall, I was content with my life, and I told myself that I didn't need a husband to feel complete and fulfilled.Then I met Ben. Beautiful, kind, funny Ben who seemed way too good to be true, especially after I learned that he actually shared my feelings on children. The subject came up the night we met, on a blind date orchestrated by our mutual friends, Ray and Annie. We were at Nobu, making small talk over yellowtail sashimi and rock shrimp tempura, when we became distracted by a young boy, no older than six, seated at the table next to us. The boy was ultratrendy, wearing a little black Kangol hat and a Lacoste polo with the collar turned up. His posture was ramrod straight, and he was proudly ordering his sushi, proper pronunciation and all, with no input from his parents. Clearly this was not his first trip to Nobu. In fact, I'd have guessed that he had eaten sushi more often than grilled-cheese sandwiches.Ben and I watched him, smiling in the way people often smile at children and puppies, when I blurted out, "If you have to have kids, that's certainly the kind to have."Ben leaned across the table and whispered, "You mean one with a bowl cut and a hip wardrobe?""No. The kind that you can take to Nobu on a school night," I said matter-of-factly. "I'm not interested in eating chicken fingers at T.G.I. Friday's. Ever."Ben cleared his throat and smirked. "So you don't want to live in the suburbs and eat at Friday's or you don't want kids?" he asked, as I noticed his slight, sexy underbite."Neither. Both. All of the above," I said. Then, just in case I hadn't been clear enough, I added for good measure, "I don't want to eat at Friday's, I don't want to live in the suburbs, and I don't want kids."It was a lot to put out there so soon, particularly at our age. Ben and I were both thirty-one--old enough to place the issue of kids firmly on most men's list of taboo topics for first dates. Taboo assuming you want kids, that is. If you don't want them, then raising the topic is akin to announcing that you are close friends with Anna Kournikova and that you and she enjoy three-ways, particularly first-date three-ways. In other words, your date probably won't view you as marriage material, but he'll certainly be enthusiastic about dating you. Because a thirty-one-year-old woman who does not want children equals a nonpressure situation, and most bachelors relish nonpressure situations--which is why they target women in their twenties. It gives them a cushion, some breathing room.On the flip side, I knew I could be automatically disqualified for long-term consideration as I had with so many guys in my recent past. After all, most people--women and men--view not wanting kids as a deal breaker. At the very least, I risked coming across as cold and selfish, two traits that don't top the list of "what every man wants."But in the messy world of dating, I had grown to favor candor at the expense of positioning and posturing. It was a nice advantage of not wanting kids. I wasn't up against that infamous clock. Nor was I about checking the boxes on a blueprint of life. As a result, I could afford total honesty. Full disclosure even on first dates.So after I floated the kid issue out there with Ben, I held my breath, fearing that familiar, critical look. But Ben was all smiles as he exclaimed, "Neither do I!" in that jubilant and marveling tone people adopt when they've just stumbled upon a staggering coincidence. Like the time I ran into my third-grade teacher at a pub in London. Maybe the chances of being on a first date and discovering that neither party wants children aren't quite as slim as sitting on a barstool on the other side of the ocean, sipping a pint, and glancing up to see a teacher you haven't run across in two decades. But it's certainly not every day that you can find someone who wants to have a monogamous, meaningful relationship but also opt out of the seemingly automatic choice to experience the magical world of parenthood. Ben's expression seemed to register an understanding of all of this."Have you ever noticed how couples discuss the merits of having children early versus late?" he asked me earnestly.I nodded as I tried to pinpoint his eye color--a pleasant combination of pale green and gray outlined with a dark ring. He was handsome, but beyond his fine nose, thick hair, and broad, muscular build was that incandescent intangible my best friend, Jess, calls the "sparkle factor." His face was alive and bright. He was the kind of man you see on the subway and wish you knew, your eyes uncontrollably darting to his left ring finger.Ben continued, "And how the main feature of each scenario is freedom? The freedom that either comes early in life or late in life?"I nodded again."Well," he said, pausing to sip his wine. "If the best part of having kids early is getting it over with, and the best part about having kids late is putting off the drudgery, doesn't it follow that not having kids at all is the best of both worlds?""I couldn't agree more," I said, raising my glass to toast his philosophy. I envisioned us defying the forces of nature together (the stuff about man wanting to sow his seed and woman wanting to grow life inside of her) and bucking the rules of society that so many of my friends were blindly following. I knew I was getting way ahead of myself, imagining all of this with a man I had just met, but by the time you reach thirty-one, you know immediately if a guy has potential or not. And Ben had potential.Sure enough, the rest of our dinner went exceptionally well. No awkward lulls in the conversation, no red flags or annoying mannerisms. He asked thoughtful questions, gave good answers, and sent interested but not eager signals. So I invited him back to my apartment for a drink--something I never do on a first date. Ben and I did not kiss that night, but our arms touched as he flipped through a photo album on my coffee table. His skin felt electric against mine, and I had to catch my breath every time he turned a page.The next day Ben called me just as he said he would. I was giddy when his name lit up my caller ID, and even more so when he announced, "I just wanted to tell you that that was far and away the best first date I've ever been on."I laughed and said, "I agree. In fact, it was better than most of my second, third, and fourth dates."We ended up talking for nearly two hours, and when we finally said good-bye, Ben said what I had just been thinking--that the call felt more like five minutes. That he could talk to me forever. One can hope, I remember thinking.Then came the sex. We only waited two weeks, which went against all the standard advice from friends, family, and magazine articles. It wasn't so much that I had to be with him in any urgent, lustful sense (although that was certainly part of it). It was more that I saw no reason to squander a single night together. When I know something is right, I believe in going for it, head-on. Sure enough, our first time was neither quick nor awkward nor tentative, the usual hallmarks of first times. Instead, our bodies fit together just right, and Ben knew what I liked without having to ask. It was the kind of sex that makes you wish you were a songwriter or poet. Or at least a woman who keeps a journal, something I hadn't done since I was a kid, but a practice I promptly began the day after we made love.Ben and I quickly discovered that we had a lot more in common than our view on children, and a lot more binding us together than our crazy chemistry. We had a similar background. We both grew up in New York with two older sisters and parents who divorced late in the game. We were both hardworking, high achievers who were passionate about our careers. Ben was an architect and loved buildings as much as I loved books. We enjoyed traveling to obscure places, eating exotic food, and drinking a little too much. We loved movies and bands that were slightly offbeat without straining to be intellectual. We relished sleeping in on the weekends, reading the paper in bed, and drinking coffee into the evening hours. We were the same combination of clean freak and messy, of sentimental and pragmatic. We both had come to believe that short of something magical, relationships weren't worth the trouble.In short, we fell in love, everything clicking in place. And it wasn't the one-sided delusional happiness that comes when a woman wants desperately to believe that she's found her guy. Our relationship was so satisfying and honest and real that at some point I started to believe that Ben was my soul mate, the one person I was supposed to be with. It was a concept I had never believed in before Ben.I remember the day when all of this hit me. It was relatively early on, but well after we had exchanged our first I love yous. Ben and I were having a picnic in Central Park. People were all around us, sunning, reading, throwing Frisbees, laughing, yet it felt like we were completely alone. Whenever I was with Ben, it felt like the rest of the world fell away. We had just finished our lunch of cold fried chicken and potato salad and were lying on our backs, looking up at a very blue summer sky and holding hands, when we began that earnest but careful conversation about past loves. About the people and experiences that had brought us to the moment we were in.Fleeting references to our history had been made up to that point, and I was well aware that we were both silently making those inevitable comparisons, putting our relationship in context. She is more this and less of that. He is better or worse in these ways. It is human nature to do this--unless it's your first relationship, which might be the very reason that your first relationship feels special and remains forever sacred. But the older you get, the more cynical you become, and the more complicated and convoluted the exercise is. You begin to realize that nothing is perfect, that there are trade-offs and sacrifices. The worst is when someone in your past trumps the person in your present, and you think to yourself: if I'd known this, then maybe I wouldn't have let him go. I had been feeling that way for a long time with respect to my college boyfriend, Paul. My relationship with Paul was far from flawless, and yet I hadn't found anyone in a decade who could squelch the more than occasional longing for what we had shared.But with Ben, something was different. I was happier than I had ever been. I told him this, and I remember him asking me why it was different, why I was happier. I thought for a long time, wanting my answer to be accurate and complete. I began to awkwardly detail what made my relationship with Paul fail and spent much time ticking off Paul's specific attributes and qualities. I then listed for Ben the ways in which he was better--and more important, better for me.I said, "You are a better kisser. You are more even-tempered. You are more generous. You are smarter. You are more fair-minded."Ben nodded and looked so serious that I remember saying, "And you recycle" just to be funny. (Although it was true that Paul never recycled, which I thought said a lot about him.) As I talked, I had the distinct sense that I wasn't really capturing the essence of the way I was feeling. It was frustrating because I wanted Ben to know how special he was to me.So I sort of gave up and asked Ben the same question about his ex-girlfriend, Nicole. I had begun to piece together a pretty decent picture of her based on snippets of conversation. I knew she was half Vietnamese and looked like a porcelain doll. (I might have snooped through his drawers once and come up with a photo or two.) She was an interior designer and had met Ben on a big museum project in Brooklyn. Her favorite book was One Hundred Years of Solitude, which was also Ben's favorite book (a fact that irrationally annoyed me). She smoked--they smoked together for a long time until he quit. They lived together for three years and dated for nearly six. Their relationship was intense--high highs and miserable lows. They had only broken up the winter before. I still hadn't heard exactly why. So of course the word rebound haunted me. The name Nicole filled me with crazy jealousy."Why is this relationship different?" I asked Ben, and then worried that I was presuming a bit much. "Or is it...different?"I will never forget the way Ben looked at me, his pale eyes wide and almost glassy. He bit his bottom lip, one of his sexier habits, before he said, "That's actually not a difficult question at all. I just love you more. That's it. And I'm not saying that because she's in the past and you're in the present. I just do. In absolute terms. I mean, I loved her. I did. But I love you more. And it's really not even close."It was the best thing anyone had ever said to me, and it was the best for one reason: I felt exactly the same way. The person who loved me like this was the person I loved back--which can feel like an absolute miracle. It is an absolute miracle.So it came as no surprise when Ben proposed a few weeks later. And then, seven months later, on the anniversary of our first date, we eloped, tying the knot on an idyllic white crescent beach in St. John. It was not a popular move with our families, but we wanted the day to be only about us. Right after we exchanged our vows, I remember looking out across the sea and thinking that it was just the two of us, our lifetime together stretching endlessly ahead. Nothing would ever change, except the addition of wrinkles and gray hair and sweet, satisfying memories.Of course the subject of children surfaced often during our newlywed days, but only when responding to rude inquiries regarding our plans to procreate from everyone and anyone: Ben's family, my family, friends, random mothers in the park, even our dry cleaner."We're not going to have children," one of us would matter-of-factly reply, and then we would tolerate the inevitable chatter that followed about how much children enrich your lives.Once, at a book party, an editor came right out and told me that if I didn't have kids at some point, then my life "would be devoid of meaning." Now that's a pretty extreme statement. I think I said something like, "Well, gee, I might as well off myself now then, huh?" She pretended not to hear me and kept going on about her children.Another common response was the sympathetic nod from people who believed that we were actually concealing a painful truth: our inability to conceive. Like the time a friend of Ben's from college slipped me a business card with her fertility clinic information scrawled on the back. I handed it to Ben who promptly announced to his friend that he had had a vasectomy several months into our marriage. This wasn't true--I was on the pill--but there was something about his statement that both shamed her and shut her up.And the final recurrent motif was the whole, "Who is going to take care of you when you're old?" query. Ben and I would say, "Each other." They'd (unbelievably) respond, "But what about when one of you dies?" At which point, things would really become cheery. Occasionally I'd point out that nursing homes are filled with people whose children never visit. That children are no guarantee of anything. You could have a kid who becomes a poor, struggling artist. Or a kid who grows into a selfish, ne'er-do-well adult. Or a kid who has special needs that render him unable to care for himself, let alone his elderly parents. Bottom line, Ben and I agreed that worrying about your care is a stupid, selfish reason to procreate anyway. We preferred to work hard and save our money, rather than burden a future generation.But over time, we learned to keep quiet on the subject. It was so much easier that way. We would simply exchange a knowing glance and then discuss it all later. We were annoyed by the narrow-minded assumption that children were a given, but at the same time, we enjoyed the underlying smugness that came from being part of a childfree union. Our relationship was about freedom and possibility and exploration. We were together because we wanted to be together. Not because we needed a partner in parenthood or because children were keeping us together, caging us with eighteen years of obligation.Then, about two years into our marriage, something changed.It was subtle at first, as changes in relationships typically are, so it is hard to pinpoint the genesis. But, looking back, I think it all began when Ben and I went on a ski trip with Annie and Ray, the couple who had set us up on our first date. I had known Annie since our bingeing college days, so I noticed right away that she was sticking with Perrier. At first she claimed to be on antibiotics for a sinus infection, but the whole antibiotic excuse had never slowed her in the past so I dragged the truth out of her. She was eight weeks pregnant."Was it planned?" I blurted out, thinking surely it had been an accident. Annie adored her career as a documentary filmmaker and had a million different causes on the side. She had never expressed an interest in having children, and I couldn't fathom her making time for motherhood.Annie and Ray clasped hands and nodded in unison."But I thought you didn't want kids," I said."We didn't want kids right away," Annie said. "But we feel ready now. Although I guess you're never completely ready!" She laughed in a high-pitched, schoolgirlish way, her cheeks flushing pink."Hmm," I said.Ben kicked me under the table and said, "Well, congratulations, guys! This is awesome news." Then he shot me a stern look and said, "Isn't that wonderful news, Claudia?""Yes. Wonderful," I said, but I couldn't help feeling betrayed. Ben and I were going to lose our favorite traveling companions, our only close friends who were as unfettered as we were by babies and all their endless accoutrements.We finished dinner, our conversation dominated by talk of children and Westchester real estate.Later, when Ben and I were alone in our room, he chastised me for being so transparently unsupportive. "You could have at least pretended to be happy for them," he said. "Instead of grilling them about birth control.""I was just so shocked," I said. "Did you have any idea?"Ben shook his head and with a fleeting expression of envy said, "No. But I think it's great.""Don't tell me you want them now, too?" I asked him, mostly joking.Ben answered quickly, but his words registered flat and false. "Of course not," he said. "Don't be ridiculous."Over the next few months, things only got more troubling. Ben became all too interested in the progress of Annie's pregnancy. He admired the ultrasound photos, even taping one to our refrigerator. I told him that we were not a "tape things to the refrigerator" kind of family."Jeez, Claudia. Lighten up," Ben said, appearing agitated as he pulled down the murky black-and-white image and slapped it into a drawer. "You really should be happier for them. They're our best friends, for chrissake."A short time after that, right before Annie and Ray had their baby, Ben and I planned a last-minute weekend getaway to the resort where we had been married. It was early January when the abrupt disappearance of Christmas decorations and tourists always makes Manhattan seem so naked and bleak, and Ben said he couldn't wait until early March for our tentatively planned trip to Belize. I remember tossing some shorts and a new red bikini into my leather duffel and remarking how nice it was to have spontaneity in our relationship, the freedom to fly off at a moment's notice.Ben said, "Yes. There are some wonderful things about our life together."This sentence struck me as melancholy--even ominous--but I didn't press him on it. I didn't even pressure him to talk when he was uncharacteristically taciturn on our flight down to the Caribbean.I didn't really worry until later that night when we were settling into our room, unpacking our clothes and toiletries. I momentarily stopped to inspect the view of the sea outside our room, and as I turned back toward my suitcase, I caught a glimpse of Ben in the mirror. His mouth was curled into a remorseful frown. I panicked, remembering what my sister, Maura, once said about men who cheat. She is an expert on the topic as her husband, Scott, had been unfaithful with at least two women she knew of. "Look out if they're really mean or really nice. Like if they start giving you flowers and jewelry for no reason," she had said. "Or taking you away on a romantic getaway. It's the guilt. They're trying to make up for something." I tried to calm down, telling myself that I was being paranoid. Ben and I always took spontaneous trips together; we never needed a reason.Still, I wanted to dispel the lingering images of Ben pressed against a sweaty bohemian lover, so I sat on the bed, kicked off my flip-flops, and said, "Ben. Talk to me. What's on your mind?"He swallowed hard and sat next to me. The bed bounced slightly under his weight and the motion made me feel even more nervous."I don't know how to say this," Ben said, his voice cracking. "So I'll just come out with it."I nodded, feeling queasy. "Go ahead.""I think I might want kids after all."I felt a rush of relief and even laughed out loud. "You scared me." I laughed again, louder, and then opened a Red Stripe from the minibar."I'm serious, Claudia.""Where is all of this coming from? Annie and Ray?""Maybe. I don't know. It's's just this feeling I have," Ben said, making a fist over his heart.At least he hasn't cheated on me, I thought. A betrayal of that magnitude could never be erased or forgotten. His fleeting wish for a child would surely go away. But as Ben continued to spout off his list of reasons why a baby might be a good thing--stuff about showing children the world, doing things better than our parents had done--my relief gave way to something else. It was a sense of losing control. A sense that something was slipping away.I tried to stay calm as I delivered a rather eloquent speech. I told him that all of that parenthood stuff wasn't who we were. I said that our relationship was built upon our unique twoness, the concept that three or more is a crowd. I pointed out that we couldn't have taken this last-minute trip. We'd be anchored to home all the time."But we'd have other things," Ben said. "And what if we really are missing out on something great? I've never heard a single person say they regret having a child.""Would they admit it if they did?" I said."Maybe not," Ben said. "But the point is, I don't think they ever would.""I totally disagree...I mean, why are there boarding schools? The mere existence of boarding schools proves something, right?" I asked. I was partly kidding about the boarding schools, but Ben didn't laugh.I sighed and then decided to change the subject altogether, focus on having fun. Show Ben what we'd be missing with children."Let's get changed and go to dinner," I said, turning up "One Love" on our portable CD player and thinking that there's nothing like a little Bob Marley to put you in a childfree, unencumbered state of mind.But despite my best efforts to have a good time, the rest of our weekend passed with an increasing tension. Things felt forced between us, and Ben's mood went from quiet to lugubrious. On our third and final night on the island, we took a cab to Asolare, a restaurant with incredible views of Cruz Bay. We ate in virtual silence, commenting only on the sunset and our perfectly prepared lobster tail. Just as our waitress brought us our coffee and sorbet, I looked at Ben and said, "You know what? We had a deal."As soon as the words came out, I knew how utterly ridiculous I sounded. Marriage is never a done deal. Not even when you have children together, although that certainly helps your case. And the irony of that seemed overwhelmingly sad.Ben tugged on his earlobe and said, "I want to be a father.""Fine. Fine," I said. "But do you want a baby more than you want to be my husband?"He reached out and put one hand over mine. "I want both," he said as he squeezed my fingers."Well. You can't have both," I said, trying to keep the angry edge out of my voice.I waited for him to say that of course he'd always pick me. That it was the only thing in the world he was really sure of. "So? Which is it?" I said.It wasn't supposed to be a test, but it suddenly felt like one. Ben stared down at his cappuccino for a long time. Then he moved his hand from mine and slowly stirred three cubes of sugar into his mug.When he finally looked up at me, there was guilt and grief in his gray-green eyes, and I knew I had my answer.BABY PROOF Copyright © 2006 by Emily Giffin

Bookclub Guide

From the author of the smash hits Something Borrowed and Something Blue comes a novel that explores the question: is there ever a deal-breaker when it comes to true love?First comes love. Then comes marriage. Then comes . . . a baby carriage? Isn't that what all women want? Not so for Claudia Parr. And just as she gives up on finding a man who feels the same way, she meets warm, wonderful Ben. Things seem too good to be true when they fall in love and agree to buck tradition with a satisfying, child-free marriage. Then the unexpected occurs: one of them has a change of heart. One of them wants children after all. This is the witty, heartfelt story about what happens to the perfect couple when they suddenly want different things. It's about feeling that your life is set and then realizing that nothing is as you thought it was---and that there is no possible compromise. It's about deciding what is most important in life, and taking chances to get it. But most of all, it's about the things we will do---and won't do---for love.

Editorial Reviews

"Giffin's writing is true, smart, and heartfelt. Claudia is both flawed and achingly real." -Entertainment Weekly"Smart, snappy...sure to provoke discussion." -People"[An] entertaining and unpredictable quest." -Redbook"[A] wry twist on the classic relationship deal-breaker." -New York Times"When it comes to writing stories that resonate with real women, best-selling author Emily Giffin has hit her stride. [BABY PROOF] examines the great lengths people go for each other, and is filled with great female characters." -San Francisco Chronicle"Thoughtful.The idea that someone, especially a woman, might sincerely just not want to have children is a stubborn taboo. Giffin carefully navigates its implications, drawing Claudia as both painfully self-aware and prone to bouts of romantic naivete.[and] paints [her] heartbreak at losing Ben with sensitivity and grace." -Chicago Sun-Times"One of the sharpest writers out there.profound, humorous, and reveals layers about a woman's deepest desires." -Arizona Republic"Thought-provoking meditation on our culture's focus on parenthood and family." -Washington Post"Emily Giffin [is a] creator of characters so real and so enthrallingly flawed that people sometimes forget they are fictional. Complicated and unexpected." -Atlanta Journal Constitution"[The characters are] funny and flawed, ambitious and insecure, relatable enough to feel like a good friend while enduring dramatic crises enough for a dozen women." -Elle"Giffin's easy flow lets you relate immediately to her characters, and even if you can't identify with the parenthood question, Claudia's crisis resonates. Giffin captures the experience of being thirtysomething particularly well - as she did with the twentysomethings of her last two novels." -Miami Herald"[BABY PROOF] is by turns a funny and serious exploration of how difficult it can be, even in this age of choice, to choose the childless path." -Hartford Courant"By avoiding easy answers, Giffin once again proves she's one of the best in this thoughtful, layered, and wholly original story of a woman facing a major choice in her life." -Booklist"Immensely refreshing.challenging [and] thought-provoking." -Pages magazine"What if it was decided - way before the first vow was ever exchanged - that the marriage wouldn't include children? And then one of the partners has a change of heart? That's the compelling topic that.Emily Giffin explores wonderfully in BABY PROOF." -Columbus Dispatch"Emily Giffin explores the awesome power of a love too real to give up. Wonderful characters.and unbeatable prose." -Oakland Tribune"Giffin's introspective and moving love story is an ode to those who take the road less traveled." -The Atlantan"Emily Giffin keeps you in suspense until the last possible moments, which makes for a page-turning and quick read. If you've ever had doubts about having children or have decided not to have them, you should see some part of yourself reflected in this novel." -Richmond Times-Dispatch"Smart, witty. Makes an intriguing story.a cut above." -Seattle Times"This take on contemporary relationships asks whether a childless-by-choice marriage is selfish, then moves on to fallout for philandering spouses, infertility, problem parents and the challenge of seemingly irredeemable mistakes. Thought-provoking." -Dallas Morning News"Emily Giffin delivers a warm, witty story about a perfect couple who suddenly finds themselves at odds over the decision to have children. A must-read for any woman, mother or not." -Jezebel magazine"Emily Giffin has proven herself as a master storyteller and writer. Though BABY PROOF entertains with its relationship drama, it also digs deep into the more serious issue of exactly what it means to choose not to have children. It raises important questions about how we, as women, define ourselves." -Woodbury magazine"Bestselling author Emily Giffin is a savant of unsympathetic situations, effortlessly bringing depth and humanity to flawed heroines. There are no easy answers in this achingly honest exploration of whether there's such thing as a 'deal-breaker' in true love. What you do get are dynamic, layered storytelling.and an ending guaranteed to have Giffin's legions of female fans talking." -Edmonton Journal"A sometimes funny, always thoughtful exploration about how life sometimes has other plans for us than the ones we make for ourselves." -Library Journal"Offers multiple and complex perspectives on the crazy experiment that is parenting." -Daily Candy"Impeccable writing.Giffin steers clear of cliché by creating characters who are not only likeable and honest, but as vivid and real as your closest friends.Delightful and captivating." -Austin Fit magazine