Being an unsigned band isn't a situation -- it's a mental illness. Few people realise they're suffering from this affliction. But Russell Groom knows, and he wants to change things fast. Efficient and diligent, Russell doesn't fit the traditional rock-star mould, and his deeply unsigned and woefully unexceptional band are headed nowhere. To make matters worse, Russell is 'alcohol intolerant' -- he prefers a good strong double espresso -- says no to drugs and is starting to have murderous thoughts towards Jake, his clanging, vacuous and perpetually at-odds-with-reality front man. Enter Josh -- the enigmatic and blithely arrogant son of a successful record producer -- with an offer that's impossible to refuse.
Tim Thornton's new novel is a hilarious fly-on-the-wall trip into the life of an unsigned band: cramped and sweaty rehearsal rooms, crap day jobs, empty gigs and interminable trips down the A303 to dodgy festival slots in Wiltshire. It is a story of friendships unstitched and distorting ambitions, and with a lesson: unsigned bands never become signed bands. They have to die first.