How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving by David RichoHow to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving by David Richo

How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving

byDavid Richo

Paperback | June 18, 2002

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"Most people think of love as a feeling," says David Richo, "but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present." In this book, Richo offers a fresh perspective on love and relationships—one that focuses not on finding an ideal mate, but on becoming a more loving and realistic person. Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life:

   1.  Attention to the present moment; observing, listening, and noticing all the feelings at play in our relationships.
   2.  Acceptance of ourselves and others just as we are.
   3.  Appreciation of all our gifts, our limits, our longings, and our poignant human predicament.
   4.  Affection shown through holding and touching in respectful ways.
   5.  Allowing life and love to be just as they are, with all their ecstasy and ache, without trying to take control.

When deeply understood and applied, these five simple concepts—what Richo calls the five A's—form the basis of mature love. They help us to move away from judgment, fear, and blame to a position of openness, compassion, and realism about life and relationships. By giving and receiving these five A's, relationships become deeper and more meaningful, and they become a ground for personal transformation.
David Richo, PhD, is a psychotherapist, teacher, writer, and workshop leader whose work emphasizes the benefits of mindfulness and loving-kindness in personal growth and emotional well-being. He is the author of numerous books, including How to Be an Adult in Relationships and The Five Things We Cannot Change. He lives in Santa Barbara...
Title:How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful LovingFormat:PaperbackPublished:June 18, 2002Publisher:ShambhalaLanguage:English

The following ISBNs are associated with this title:

ISBN - 10:1570628122

ISBN - 13:9781570628122

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Rated 4 out of 5 by from Interesting Read Very helpful. Makes you stop and think before you say or do something that you may regret.
Date published: 2018-03-26
Rated 5 out of 5 by from An Inspiration! I highly recommend this book. It is well informative and easy to read as well!
Date published: 2017-02-22
Rated 5 out of 5 by from Read it! It is a perfect book for understanding how to be more emotionally balanced and mature in relationships. It is well informative and easy to read as well! This book is basically a cheaper and longer councilling session... it's that good!!
Date published: 2017-02-18
Rated 5 out of 5 by from A Must Read Book For Everyone This is an excellent book for anyone who actually wants to grow up and become an emotionally, psychologically, well-adjusted adult with the capacity to be compassionate, empathetic, and non-judgmental. It explains in a very clear and reader friendly way what it means to be a mature human being and how to free oneself from ego mindsets and not be hooked by the ego mindsets of others. It offers the best definition I have encountered so far, as to the true meaning of what it means to be neurotic and how to free oneself from these tendencies. This book has lists which clarify what is healthy and what is unhealthy in terms of all types of relationship difficulties. It is not limited to romantic relationships but relates its teachings to all types of relationships: couples, parent/child, friends, co-workers, siblings etc. Everyone would benefit from the insights offered in this amazing book. The only criticism I have is the quote chosen for the cover of the book which creates the mis-guided impression that it is for romantic relationships only. This is absolutely not true.. If you want to be a better, more well-adjusted person in life, living, and all your relationships, there could not be a better book to read, absorb and incorporate into your daily life and relationships. This is a must read book for everyone.
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Rated 5 out of 5 by from An Inspiration! I highly recommend this book. If you are fed up with the unenlightened drone of typical relationship books, then this is the book for you. Topics such as "How to keep your Man/Woman", "The Rules for Dating", "What women/men are really saying" etc. are not found among these easy to read pages. It does not boast a fool proof "12 step method" to becoming an adult in relationships but instead inspires one to take their own personalized steps. Wrapped in its inspiring words I have discovered what love and relationships truly mean for me, and it has become a great resource for becoming a better partner by becoming a more enlightened and peaceful person. Growth of the individual is at the core of this book and I have taken to heart what the author has made available through his well-articulated ideas. I will continue to try to make this mindful philosophy a practicing part of my life.
Date published: 2002-06-29

Editorial Reviews

"Well-constructed and thought-provoking."—Spirituality & Health

"An inspiring and highly practical guide to effective relationships."—Kathlyn Hendricks, coauthor of Conscious Loving and The Conscious Heart