Love is a Story: A New Theory of Relationships

Paperback | March 15, 1999

byRobert J. Sternberg

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In this groundbreaking work, Robert Sternberg opens the book of love and shows you how to discover your own story--and how to read your relationships in a whole new light. What draws us so strongly to some people and repels us from others? What makes some relationships work so smoothly and others burst into flames? Sternberg gives us new answers to these questions by showing that the kind of relationship we create depends on the kind of love stories we carryinside us. Drawing on extensive research and fascinating examples of real couples, Sternberg identifies 26 types of love story--including the fantasy story, the business story, the collector story, the horror story, and many others--each with its distinctive advantages and pitfalls, and many ofwhich are clashingly incompatible. These are the largely unconscious preconceptions that guide our romantic choices, and it is only by becoming aware of the kind of story we have about love that we gain the freedom to create more fulfilling and lasting relationships. As long as we remain obliviousto the role our stories play, we are likely to repeat the same mistakes again and again. But the enlivening good news this book brings us is that though our stories drive us, we can revise them and learn to choose partners whose stories are more compatible with our own. Quizzes in each chapter help you to see which stories you identify with most strongly and which apply to your partner. Are you a traveler, a gardener, a teacher, or something else entirely? Love is a Story shows you how to find out.

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From Our Editors

Have you ever wondered why you’re drawn to some people and not others? Contemplated what makes some relationships work out while others fail miserably? Robert Sternberg explains that the kind of relationship we create depends on the love stories we carry around inside us. He uses real couples as examples to outline 26 types of love sto...

From the Publisher

In this groundbreaking work, Robert Sternberg opens the book of love and shows you how to discover your own story--and how to read your relationships in a whole new light. What draws us so strongly to some people and repels us from others? What makes some relationships work so smoothly and others burst into flames? Sternberg ...

Robert J. Sternberg, Ph.D., is IBM Professor of Psychology and Education at Yale University. He is the coauthor of Satisfaction in Close Relationships, the author of Successful Intelligence, Thinking Styles and many other books and articles. He lives in Hamden, Connecticut.

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Format:PaperbackDimensions:256 pages, 8.82 × 5.59 × 0.79 inPublished:March 15, 1999Publisher:Oxford University PressLanguage:English

The following ISBNs are associated with this title:

ISBN - 10:0195131029

ISBN - 13:9780195131024

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From Our Editors

Have you ever wondered why you’re drawn to some people and not others? Contemplated what makes some relationships work out while others fail miserably? Robert Sternberg explains that the kind of relationship we create depends on the love stories we carry around inside us. He uses real couples as examples to outline 26 types of love stories, from the horror story to the fantasy, the business sttaleory to the collector. Love is a Story shows you how to find out what story applies to you and your partner.

Editorial Reviews

"In this illuminating book, one of psychology's most distinguished researchers brings clarity and insight to the topic of romantic love without stripping love of its romance.... Sternberg helps us identify and appreciate our own love stories, and he offers valuable suggestions about how toconnect our stories to the stories of others, so that we may all live a little more happily."--Dan P. McAdams, Ph.D., Charles Deering McCormick Professor of Psychology and Human Development, Northwestern University