Over the Walls of Anger, Into Each Other's Arms: Managing Anger through the Lens of Attachment Theory by Susan ArmitageOver the Walls of Anger, Into Each Other's Arms: Managing Anger through the Lens of Attachment Theory by Susan Armitage

Over the Walls of Anger, Into Each Other's Arms: Managing Anger through the Lens of Attachment…

bySusan Armitage

Paperback | October 26, 2018

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What if anger in your relationship is actually a desire for deeper connection? In fact, this is often the case. It’s quite a paradox that a desire for closeness stirs anger that pushes you further apart! Attachment theory explains this natural effect.

When you’ve erected dividing walls of anger, it may seem impossible to reconnect. You’ve argued time and again, and find yourselves in repetitive cycles of anger.

This practical guide takes you through steps of anger management—building emotional intelligence, stress management, communication skills, and conflict resolution—with a focus on attachment styles that contribute to the turmoil in which you find yourselves. Attachment theory explains how fear, shame, depression or anxiety are natural responses that contribute to anger, and your cycle.

Walls of anger don’t have to remain—you can overcome them. Build the relationship you’ve always wanted, and leap Over the Walls of Anger, Into Each Other’s Arms!

Susan Armitage, M.Div., RP, RMFT, CAMS is a registered psychotherapist with the College of Registered Psychotherapists of Ontario, a registered marriage and family therapist with the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapists, and a certified anger management specialist with the National Anger Management Association. She h...
Title:Over the Walls of Anger, Into Each Other's Arms: Managing Anger through the Lens of Attachment…Format:PaperbackDimensions:216 pagesPublished:October 26, 2018Language:English

The following ISBNs are associated with this title:

ISBN - 10:1486613969

ISBN - 13:9781486613960


Table of Contents

Preface, Acknowledgements, Introduction, Chapter 1: Over The Walls Of Silence, Chapter 2: Over The Walls Of Anger, Chapter 3: Over The Walls Of Abandonment, Chapter 4: Over The Walls Of Shame, Chapter 5: Over The Walls Of Blame, Chapter 6: Over The Walls Of Stress, Chapter 7: Over The Walls Of Depression And Anxiety, Chapter 8: Over The Walls Of Negative Thinking, Chapter 9: Over The Walls Of Unforgiveness, Chapter 10: Into Each Other’s Arms, Chapter 11: Into The Everlasting Arms, Appendix A, Appendix B, Endnotes

Editorial Reviews

Pastors are frequently given or asked to read certain books. Some are helpful, others not so much. This work by Susan Armitage will prove to be a very helpful resource for those who counsel or pastor married couples. As a pastor, I have already been able to apply the learning from this book in marriage counselling.  Couples marry with all the best intentions. But over time we see something in our partner we had not seen; they see something in us, too. This triggers an angry response. We all carry forward into our marriages the legacy of emotions and thought processes developed since childhood. We learned from our parents how to be parents and partners. We picked up, very early on, our “natural” responses to stress and anxiety, anger being one common response.  This book addresses the background causes of anger as a secondary response to abandonment, shame, stress, anxiety and other triggers. With this book as a resource, the caring counsellor or pastor can bring a couple to better understand their anger triggers and get them Over the Walls of Anger and back into each other’s loving arms. —Rev. Dr. Keith J.P. DalyIn Over the Walls of Anger, Susan Armitage offers a well-designed and thoughtful focus upon anger as a psychological as well as behavioral pattern. One main achievement is that she makes attachment theory relevant to anger management clients and counselors. Most of her chapters begin with a couple quarreling, then describes the problematic emotional cycle that has arisen between them, goes on to describe how such cycles are developed and maintained, and then concludes with sensible questions designed to help readers address the personal relevance of that chapter's topic. More specific advice is offered near the conclusion of the book, adding impact to the volume. I highly recommend this book for couples working together on their anger issues as well as for individuals concerned about how their anger affects their intimate relationships.  —Ronald Potter-Efron, M.SW, Ph.D.  Author of over twenty books, including Angry All the Time, Letting Go of Shame and Healing the Angry Brain. In this book Susan Armitage has distilled the key elements of Family Systems Theory, Emotionally Focused Therapy, Attachment Theory, Emotional Intelligence and spiritual resources, and has applied them specifically to the issue of anger in couple relationships.  The book is clear, concise, well researched and well documented.  It is filled with helpful vignettes that help to illustrate the theories. Insights are given to help understand the roots of anger. The book offers practical suggestions for working through the anger. The book will be useful both to clients and to therapists.  I have already used some of the strategies and will be recommending the book to others.  —Paul D. Scuse, DMin Associate Professor of Counselling (Tyndale University College and Seminary)  Clinical Director (Emmaus Counselling Services)  Registered Psychotherapist (College of Registered Psychotherapists of Ontario)  Registered Marriage and Family Therapist (American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy)