Whale Done Parenting: How To Make Parenting A Positive Experience For You And Your Kids by Jim BallardWhale Done Parenting: How To Make Parenting A Positive Experience For You And Your Kids by Jim Ballard

Whale Done Parenting: How To Make Parenting A Positive Experience For You And Your Kids

byJim Ballard, Thad Lacinak, Chuck Tompkins

Paperback | October 19, 2009

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“How is it they can get a killer whale to urinate on cue, and we can’t get our son to pee into the toilet?”

Amy Sheldrake, young mother and killer whale trainer-in-training, marvels at the complex behaviors her superiors at SeaWorld are able to coax out of these enormous beasts, while she and her husband struggle to make their beloved—and much smaller—son Josh obey the simplest rules. Using the story approach popularized by Ken Blanchard in his many bestsellers, this unique parenting book draws on the experiences of two of the coauthors—as both pioneering marine mammal trainers and as parents—to show how the same principles that induce killer whales to leap into the air can persuade young children to go quietly to bed.

Like Amy and her husband Matt, once you get the hang of the three Whale Done principles, you’ll see a dramatic difference in overcoming challenges like following bedtime routines, dealing with tantrums, introducing new foods, sharing, avoiding overuse of the word no, learning to care for a pet, and instituting time-outs.
Jim Ballard is an educator, corporate trainer, and writer. Ken Blanchard is the author of several bestselling books, including the blockbuster international bestseller The One Minute Manager®. He is Chief Spiritual Officer of the Ken Blanchard Companies. Thad Lacinak is founder and co-owner of a behavioral consulting company, Precision...
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Title:Whale Done Parenting: How To Make Parenting A Positive Experience For You And Your KidsFormat:PaperbackDimensions:176 pages, 8.5 × 5.5 × 0.54 inPublished:October 19, 2009Publisher:Berrett-koehlerLanguage:English

The following ISBNs are associated with this title:

ISBN - 10:1605093483

ISBN - 13:9781605093482

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Read from the Book

Redirecting Your Thinking about Parenting AS A PARENT, have you ever had a child throw a tantrum or refuse to go to bed on time, eat good foods, or share toys? Do you find yourself scolding or yelling at your child and overusing the word no? Have you despaired of training your child to use the potty? Do you struggle with getting a child to do homework or chores? Do you deal with teasing, fighting, or poor manners? Do you need better methods for setting limits and handling time-outs and discipline? Parenting can be trying. As challenges pile up, it’s easy for a mom or dad to get into a rut and become locked into a negative, downward spiral that makes the relationship unpleasant for both parent and child. At such times it’s difficult even to imagine that there might be a better way. But that better way is precisely what this book offers. Simply put, it’s a way to feel good as a parent—good about yourself, good about your relationship with your child, and good about life at home again. Whale Done Parenting contains a formula that is positive and based on principles that are scientifically validated. Most important of all, it works! This is a book about bringing to the parenting of children the behavioral principles that have succeeded spectacularly in marine mammal training. The principle is a familiar one: Accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative. It’s actually simple, but it is anything but easy. Much of the book focuses on children up to the age of five, but later chapters explain how the same techniques can be applied to older children, including teenagers. Indeed, the Whale Done approach works with people of all ages because it is based on universal principles of behavioral science. Most new parents model their approach on what their own parents did. In some cases this turns out okay; more often these parents perpetuate the negative aspects of parenting they remember. The results can be disastrous. The principles and techniques presented in Whale Done Parenting are taken not from memories of childhood or armchair speculation, but from solid behavioral science principles. As we described in the first book, Whale Done!, modern marine mammal training is based on positive reinforcement. It wasn’t always so. In the early 1970s animal training was a different world. At that time, there was very little science in the approaches animal trainers used. Animal training at that time was a male-dominated profession. In most cases, individual trainers forged their own styles and strategies with limited success and with limited attempt to cooperate or share ideas with their fellow trainers. Back then we weren’t purposely ignoring the science of operant conditioning—we simply didn’t know what operant conditioning was! SeaWorld animal trainers began to think there must be a better way. They undertook a thorough examination of the field of behavioral science. The result was that Sea-World was instrumental in pioneering the reinforcement-based training now used throughout the world. We were very limited with the kinds of reinforcement that we used. The use of one reinforcer—food—was limited in its ability to develop deep, lasting relationships with the animals. Gradually SeaWorld trainers—using a wide variety of things whales liked, to reward and reinforce desired behaviors—evolved stronger bonds that eventually allowed us to get in the water with the animals. This led to the spectacular performances you see from these animals today. As Thad and Chuck were learning about training killer whales, Ken Blanchard was observing the negative effects of command-and-control leadership on people in organizations. Ken was suggesting that the key to developing people was to catch them doing something right. Serendipity brought Thad, Chuck, Ken, and Jim together, and the result was Whale Done! The Power of Positive Relationships. Since its publication in 2003 Whale Done! not only has achieved extraordinary success, but it also has changed lives in the process. It’s a story of how a man established good relationships with his family and company by applying the same set of principles used by professionals to train killer whales. In the years since bringing out Whale Done! we have often been asked, “Can the principles featured in that book be applied to parenting young children?” It became very clear that a second book was needed that would provide a resounding yes to that query. Applying Whale Done training to children is a natural process. In fact, it’s much easier and more lasting than with adults. Whale Done is much more than a set of techniques. It is an entire philosophy, one that is sorely needed in the world today. Simply stated, what we call Whale Done is a way of looking at people and seeing the best that is in them. Our hope is that this book will educate and inspire mothers, fathers, grandparents, and others who help raise children to look at their roles with new eyes. And we trust that as you read the story of Amy and Matt and their son Josh, you will recognize what you knew all along: there’s power in being positive.

Table of Contents

Foreword
Introduction: Recasting Your Thinking About Parenting
CHAPTER ONE: An Exciting New Job and Challenges at Home
CHAPTER TWO: The Bedtime Waltz: Establishing a Bedtime Routine
CHAPTER THREE: A-B-C: The Universal Principle
CHAPTER FOUR: The Redirection Strategy: Handling Tantrums
CHAPTER FIVE: An Acquired Taste: Meal Time
CHAPTER SIX: Chucking the Binky: Extinguishing Dependency on Comfort Items
CHAPTER SEVEN: Not Just Mine: Teaching Your Child to Share
CHAPTER EIGHT: Overusing “No” and A Visit to the Dentist
CHAPTER NINE: Word Gets Around: Whale Done Parenting for All Ages
CHAPTER TEN: Puppy Love: Teaching Pet Care
CHAPTER ELEVEN: When Things Get Emotional: Time-Outs
CHAPTER TWELVE: A Big Step: Potty Training
CHAPTER THIRTEEN: Please and Thank You: Moral Development
A Poolside Chat: Resources for Applying Whale Done Principles
The Science behind the Whale Done Approach
Acknowledgments
About the Authors
Ken Blanchard Companies Services Available

Editorial Reviews

“When we instituted a Whale Done-based program at Schaeffer Elementary we saw suspensions go down 95 percent, and math and reading proficiency improved dramatically. These principles work—kids really respond!” —Cynthia Zurchin, Principal, Schaeffer Elementary School, Pittsburgh “We long to be better parents who, with our kids, make a better world, and Whale Done Parenting helps us do just that. If you want to raise good kids and see more smiling and less scolding in your household, read this book!” —Naomi Cramer Overton, President, Mothers of Preschoolers International